How to Handle My Daughter's Jehovah Witness Grandparents

[lmf]

I'm sorry to bring this subject up again, but my daughter has been bringing up how she really misses her grandparents(who are JW) and wants to see them. All I say is that I will see what I can do, with no intentions of doing anything. However, last week she received a letter from them, with a picture of them and they asked for pictures of her. I have no problem with her sending them pictures, but I don't want her seeing them or talking to them. She is going to be Confirmed next year and I don't want them interfering now, since I have her on the right path. How do I handle this situation without her ending up hating me? Any input would be greatly appreciated.

[Hwy]

This sounds like a sticky situation. Since we don't have all the facts giving good advice is difficult, but I think the answer lies mostly in trusting God.

One thing I've learned in life is when you tell someone they can't do something, especially a younger person, it only entices them into wanting to do it more.

On the other hand I honestly understand you wanting to protect her from the things she would be exposed to if she were allowed to visit with her grandparents.

A concern I feel about this is that if she were to discover you purposely kept her from seeing them she might resent you, and it could seriously damage your relationship, and her ability to trust you.

There are a few questions that I have about this whole thing too. First of all, do her grandparents live nearby or would it require travel to see them?  Would you be present during the visit if it occurred?

I personally think if it was possible for you to be present the entire time, maybe a visit might not be so bad afterall. But then again, I don't know all the facts.

[lmf]

Hwy- you are right. I definitely would not leave her alone with them and they do not live in the same state as we do; however, I know if I allowed it they would come out here in a heart beat. I have always trusted God to take care things, but I just don't want to deal with these people at all. Thanks for the feedback.

[4given]

Mind you, this is only an opinion. One I will speak with no intention of offense.

What arises as a concern in my mind is the possible detriment which could be the outcome of purposely keeping the child isolated from her natural grandparents.

True, they may not have the most desirable system of beliefs. Equally true, and understandable, it would be somewhat uncomfortable to deal with the grandparents.

Should that in itself be a reason to nullify contact?

Could you not first converse with them and lay down ground rules whereby a mutual understanding might be arrived at. Such as, no religious discussions, no unsupervised time together, etc?

Would not this satisfy your daughters yearning to see them, and they her, while offering a degree of safety?

[lmf]

You're right. I do need to set ground rules with them. Otherwise, they will fill her head try to disrupt our relationship like they did before I got the guardianship. I also need to trust God to lead me. He got me into this, so I know he will get me out of any situation that is not a part of his plan. Thanks.

[Dylai]

a not easy thing to decide. you got God on your side tho. he put her in your life. theres a reason he did that. in tuff times. like with this. you can trust him.

[Hwy]

Another point I feel impressed to mention of is the fact that your daughter has been exposed to biblical truth through you. Truth is what sets us free.

I believe if you completely trust God in this situation not only will he protect you from any permanant damage due to their negative influences and attempts to disrupt, but also your daughter.

This could also be a thing that God will use to strengthen you. The bible is full of accounts where God's people went through tests and trials. Sometimes I think we all fail to recognize that. We don't like to think things will be tough on us. But it's all a part of our ongoing spiritual growth process.

It's going THROUGH them that refines us. Not avoiding them. But we have the promise that he will be with us in the midst of our trials. And if we stand fast in our faith that he will bring us out on the other side a better and stronger person.

A very good passage I find comforting whenever I'm facing a time of testing or trial is found in the book of Isaiah. I hope you will find it as useful as I do.

He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.

Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall:

But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

[lmf]

Thanks for the support. I know God will take care of this because he has in the past, but I always stress over it for awhile.

[Dylai]

you gonna let them visit lmf?

[lmf]

I think I will have to eventually. I just won't leave them alone with her.

[4given]

It would likely be best to permit a visit. At the same time ensuring a certain level of control exists.

I trust God will provide you the wisdom necessary to do both.

[Sheshes]

Would be the right thing.....is my thought....
Let them visit each other.....but on your terms.....
Makes me think of something....in the bible.....
Blessed are the peace makers......
It would do that I think.....give them all some peace about it....

[lmf]

It's going to come to a head soon.  A friend of hers found her cousin on facebook and gave her my daughters phone number. Now, it will get back to the grandparents and they will contact her on her cell phone. I can't tell her she can't communicate with her cousin or Aunt or any of her other relatives now, so I have to let go and let God handle it. He put us together for a reason and I have to trust him to take care of her. I really hate it when He tests me like this. 

[Dylai]

me too. dont like the tests. they make us better tho.

[4given]

We most definitely live in the information age. One could expect such a thing to occur.

Has anything yet come about as a result of the facebook discovery?

[Hwy]

I just ran across a resource that might be of interest to those who encounter JW's.

How to answer a Jehovah's witness
You can read the article online by going ----> HERE

[Dylai]

have they called her yet? the grandparents. hope every thing is ok.

[4given]

Please let us know how things develop that we might know how to pray over the matter.

[Hwy]

I think we're all hoping to hear a good report where this is concerned.